Reader,

I met with a friend recently, one conversation led to another, and we arrived on the topic of introversion vs extroversion.

She wanted the line between these two personalities blurred, cleaned off, and not talked about anymore.

She thought it was unhelpful to make such distinctions that box people, and thought it was ultimately unhelpful and restrictive—especially for introverts.

But I disagreed!

Introversion and extroversion simply signify where individuals derive their energy. Extroverts tend to gain energy from social interactions, while introverts recharge through being alone and internal reflection. These all exist on a spectrum; there’s no perfect introvert or extrovert. We all have a blend of both worlds.

Introverts might enjoy social interactions but often prefer smaller, more intimate groups over large, noisy parties.

I am probably one of the best introverts I know. I love deep, meaningful conversations with a few close friends but find large social gatherings draining.

But where necessary, I can adequately perform for hours in a large crowd with hundreds of people, for example when I speak in public — a skill I deeply love and have built proficiency in over time. But regardless, it’s still a draining activity for me, and every time, I always need to be alone after to feel energized again.

One of the most common misconceptions is equating introversion with shyness.

Shyness is a fear of social interaction–and both extroverts and introverts can have this fear.

This is an important clarification because introversion should never be an excuse for not learning critical leadership skills, such as public speaking, networking or simply sharing our perspectives in a meeting of peers.

As I told my friend, clear distinctions between Introversion and Extroversion help recognize that an introvert’s need for solitude is not an aversion to people. It is just a way to maintain our energy. It also helps us introverts know that we require the extra push to build the skills that involve social interactions.

For extroverts reading this, it might be superfluous to discuss these things, but I know for many introverts it is important to get notes and reminders like this.

Some introverted people are lucky to have had people and circumstances, especially early in life, that pushed them to build important social skills. Because of the years of practice, they have the skills and understand the importance of bringing energy into rooms and conversations, to speak in front of large audeinces, and strike up conversations with a stranger.

But many others tilted more into their preferred solitude. So, when I can, I love to sound the reminder that it is possible for introverts to stand up, raise their hands, speak up, and lead.

It is not the special quality of extroverts alone—it is a learned skill open to anyone—even for the best introverts.

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Hope this helps!

Henry

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